Tuhan A atau Tuhan B

Tadi, terserempak ngan satu teman ni, masa nak pi solat Maghrib. Biasa, mesti dia suruh aku doakan untuk dia. Dia ni non-muslim. Aku plak gurau kat dia, engko pun kene la doa ngan aku gak :p Pastu dia cakap, dia confused. Aku pun pelik, apsal?

Sebabnyer, dia kire baru convert..dari agama A pi agama B. Sebab, satu family dia convert, mak dia suruh, so, dia convertla. Masalahnyer, dia dah biasa ngan agama A dan dia suka agama A tu. Agama B pun bagus gak le. Dia pun cakap gak, dia tak pray sangat, sebab, takut nanti apa yang nak dia tak dapat, so, akan jejaskan faith dia. Lagi satu, dia tak tau nak pray ngan yang mana satu.

Dia tanyer aku, aku percaya ngan Tuhan aku ke. Iye la aku cakap. Yakin ke? Yakinnnn. Macam mana aku bley yakin sangat? Aku cakapla(dari pandangan peribadi aku), sebab bila aku susah, sedih, Tuhan aku selalu tolong aku. Selalu ke, dia tanya? Hmm..selalu la, walaupun bukan dengan cara yang aku nak kadang2, tapi, sentiasa la.

Pastu dia tanya, aku percaya beriya2 ni, dapat mimpi apa2 ke? Takde la mimpi, cuma yakin jek. Dia pun cakap, macam blind faith jek. Takde la, aku cakap.. Kalau blind faith, mesti bila aku tak dapat apa2 atau bila aku susah, aku akan "tak percaya".

Then, dia tanya, kes dia cam ne? Aku cakap la, ikutla hati engko. Mana satu yang hati ko rasa kuat, ko percaya la. Mesti ada preference kat mana2 agama. Agak teruk la jugak suggestion aku ni. Patutnya aku berdakwah pasal Islam kat dia..nak buat camna..aku tak pandai. Tak pandai pujuk, dan tak pandai paksa. Eheh.

Lepas tu dia cakap, baiklah. Nanti dia doa alternately la. Satu hari kat Tuhan agama A. Next day kat Tuhan agama B.

Daripada buat camtu, aku cakap, lenkali ko doa..."Dear God" jek. Tak yah letak nama spesifik apa2, contohnya, "Dear God A" atau "Dear God B"

Dengan harapan, nanti, bila dia doa camtu, kalau sampai hidayah Allah SWT kat dia, dia tau la itu sebenar2nya Tuhan yang sebenar. Bukan Tuhan A, bukan Tuhan B.

Peace.

dear you..

Today was quite an emotional day for me. Blame him. Mr JH.

It started off as a good morning. I was actually looking forward on presenting my case to Dr Dunne. However, it turns out that the ward round started late, and she was too busy to teach us....huk aluh.

So, me and 3 others, went to see a patient, Mr JH. He's a 46 years old guy, diagnosed of Multiple Sclerosis 7 years ago. Ask me anything about MS, I'm so expert about it now la...ahaha. Really, you have to see one patient, then you'll be able to appreciate all the facts in the yellow book. See one, understand one, master one.

And back to the patient..he was soooooo nice!! The fact that a lot of thing had happened to him, made me "sayu" seh. He was an adopted child, an engineer, a divorcee with 2 children. He then found his true love ( "it is only once in a life time you'll met that special someone who will wrap your life around their finger, not because you let them to, but because they understand you so much, it actually felt good" ), who was then died in a tragic road accident. And , he was diagnosed of the worst MS ever..the primary progressive MS. No remission. Arghhh!!

But, strangely, I felt like "I love him". Emotionally attached. Yes, he taught me about me in 45 minutes. He understood me, like no one ever had. I admire his strength, and his ability to view life in such optimistic way. I found it interesting discussing about life, religion, love and tragedies with him, and I'm glad that he was able to talk to me too. No words were deemed offensive, and at the end of every sentences we would smiled to each other.

The fact that he knew where my heart is, that was the "ajaib" part. He said I'm not as keen/serious on being a doctor (like my other 2 colleagues), as I was the chatty type. That's true. And he said that I am more empathy, concern of others, and he felt that I've too much love for people. Hmm. And the fact that I've cold hands (and warm heart..ye ke?), he said, prove everything he thought of me. He said that I'm "liberal". In what way, I asked him..In a way that, I was able to discuss about some issue, and at the same time, was able to accept opinions without bluntly agreeing to everything. Sigh. Am I?

It felt good being nice to others. You cant imagine all the encouragements you'll get from your patients by just being nice to them. Sometimes, you need them to remind yourself, what the hell are you doing here...

Pedulik hapa that I'm not a good student. Feck off with all those theories or those examination techniques. Or those medical politics and kissing butt attitudes. I just love talking to patients, listen to them...that's all..lalalala

As I quote him... "Yes, I agree with you. Love is an emotion, a feeling. Love is a "glue" that hold two people together. And yes, as you say, through love, you'll be able to be kind to and respect others."